I haven't submitted this yet - it's not due in or 2 weeks. In this, Blue's ex Andy meets her new lover Sam for the first time.
_______________________________________________________
INT: BLUE’S FLAT – LIVINGROOM
SAM is sitting on the couch, relaxed and comfortable. BLUE is agitated, nervously pacing back and forth, chewing on her nails.
BLUE
What time is it now?
SAM
The same time it was when you last asked. Five past eight.
BLUE
He’s no’ coming. He’s never late.
SAM
Give the guy a chance. He’ll have had a lot on his plate, what with the appeal and being paroled so quickly.
(pats the couch)
Sit down, love. He’ll be here when he’s here.
BLUE
(stops pacing but still stands)
Something’s up. I can feel it.
SAM
All that’s up is you fretting, my darling. Come here.
BLUE
How can you be so cool?
SAM
Because one of us needs to be.
BLUE
Aren’t you nervous?
SAM
What do I have to be nervous about? My lover’s ex-husband, newly released from prison, coming to meet me for the first time.
(chuckles)
I’m cool.
BLUE picks up a cushion from the back of the sofa and swats him gently with it.
BLUE
Be serious for once.
SAM
I am. It’ll be fine.
The DOORBELL rings.
BLUE rushes to answer.
BLUE opens the door.
ANDY is standing out on the landing and shuffles his feet on the doormat.
ANDY
Hi Blue.
BLUE
Hi Andy. Come away in. Here – give me your coat.
ANDY shrugs of his jacket.
BLUE takes it and hangs it on a peg next to the door with other coats and jackets.
SAM stands up, hand extended.
SAM
Hello Andy. I’m Sam. Sam Eastman.
ANDY
(ignoring the handshake)
Aye.
BLUE
Have a seat Andy.
(gestures to the armchair at right angles to the couch)
ANDY sits down on the edge of the chair.
BLUE
Can I get you a drink? Coffee? Tea maybe?
ANDY
Naw, lass. Ah’m fine.
BLUE sits down on the couch, next to SAM.
BLUE
So...
ANDY
So.
BLUE
Are you settled in?
ANDY
Aye.
BLUE
How is your mum? Looking after you?
ANDY
Aye. She reckons I should be with you.
BLUE
Well that’s not possible is it? Not right away, anyhow.
SAM
No.
ANDY looks at SAM, draws him a look.
BLUE
You see. That’s why we asked you over.
ANDY
We?
SAM looks to BLUE, takes her hand in his.
BLUE
Yes. We. We were wondering if...
ANDY
If what, Blue?
BLUE
Well, seeing as you and Siobhan have been getting on better recently. Her writing and phoning you. Visits and such.
ANDY
Vonnie. Aye.
BLUE
Well, she suggested that maybe you could...well...stay here. While she’s at college.
ANDY
Yeah, we’ve talked about her going tae college. And uni. Music. Aye.
BLUE
And Dad’s not an issue.
ANDY
I like Hughie. Him and me get oan.
(looks over at Sam)
BLUE
Nicky’s going to look in on him more. Got him a carer. More a home help, really.
ANDY
And this is because...
BLUE looks at SAM, then back at Andy.
BLUE
So I...I... Shit...Andy...
ANDY
So you (looks straight at BLUE) can swan off with your fancy man.
And so you pal...
(looks straight at SAM)
...so you can get your hole.
SAM lets go BLUE’s hand and stands up quickly, taking a step towards ANDY
BLUE/ SAM
(together)
Andy, for goodness sake!/ What the hell does that mean?
ANDY is struggling to keep a straight face. Fails.
ANDY
Haw haw. Ho ho.
SAM looks to BLUE, then ANDY.
ANDY
Your face is a pure picture big man.
SAM
I don’t understand.
BLUE
(to SAM)
It’s OK love.
(to ANDY)
You’re a fuckin’ comedian you are.
ANDY
Sorry. I couldnae resist.
ANDY gets up from the chair, walks round to SAM and extends his hand.
ANDY
Vonnie put me up to it. A joke, like.
SAM, still puzzled, shakes ANDY’s hand.
SAM
You’re not…
ANDY
Mad? Not at all, pal. Not at all.
ANDY claps SAM on the shoulder.
ANDY
Truth be told, I’m delighted. For you both. Vonnie says you’re a smashin’ fella.
BLUE
High praise from her.
ANDY
And you...
(reaches out to BLUE)
...it makes me glad to see you smiling again.
(to SAM)
Good work, pal.
(moves towards the kitchenette)
So, who fancies a cuppa?
SAM, still puzzled, and BLUE sit back down on the couch.
SAM goes to speak…
BLUE
Never mind, love. Never mind.
(c) Jeanne Andrew 2011
Hi Jeanne, @ChrisJames282 here. I liked all three sections, although I read them back to front! First off, character voices are very clear, well written and easy to follow. I'm left feeling suspicious of Andy's "joke" more than anything - is this your intention? It's a stretch to think that he did four years in prison for her, then is totally cool about Blue's new guy.
ReplyDeleteSam comes over a little too Mr Perfect - not much, just a shade, but there are not many guys who would be as cool as that in his situation in part 3. Similarly, Blue might be just a little too stressed - again, not much. I think in part 3 there might be a way to show more complexities in Sam and Blue before Andy arrives. I want to stress 2 things here: 1: my limitations as a reader; a script is for acting, not reading, and these lines would I'm sure come to life on the screen differently than they did in my head; 2: this is out of context. I don't what you've got planned for these characters. I'm naturally worried for Sam and Blue in relation to Andy, especially with his "joke"; but I also think you could tweak those lines before Andy arrives to show a little more complexity (esp. Sam) as well as stress Blue and Sam's increasing feelings for each other, which in turn would increase the tension before Andy's arrival.
Hope these comments are okay - all completely subjective as you know :-)
All the best,
Chris